Someday, You'll Know How I Feel
by Secret Hate of Indecision
Summary: AH: Sequel to YAMTLY. Edward's on the road to fame. Bella's on the road to fortune. Can these two deal with love and loss while trying to survive the real world? More importantly, can their relationship stay intact, or will everything fall to pieces? R&R!
1. Prologue

**Prologue**

When I was eight, I lost my favorite stuffed animal. It was a cute, cuddly pink sheep. I'd gotten it when I was five, and I named it Mr. Sheep, despite the pink "wool" it had. Every time I slept, my stuffed animals would be arranged in a certain order on my bed. My stuffed dog to my left, and then my plush teddy bear next to it. On my right would be Mr. Sheep, and right above my head would be a ginormous stuffed doggy, three times the size of my five-year-old head.

I was reckless when I was in third grade, but it wasn't as if I wasn't reckless before. I actually think I managed to leave Mr. Sheep in a hotel room. I was devastated, and Rosalie, my sister, had to sit there and hug me while I cried and cuddled my second favorite stuffed animal, a dog which I named Maxwell Lin McSpotters.

Maxwell Lin McSpotters is somewhere in my attic now.

But that's not the point. The point is, now that I look back on my childhood, I find the irony quite conspicuous. My little Edward sheep.

It was senior year, and Edward, my boyfriend, and I were perfect. We held hands and talked and laughed and went to Forks High School together while Rosalie and her boyfriend were attending their first year of college at Stanford, down in California. I was so happy. Rosalie and I emailed each other weekly, and our sisterly bond remained strong and intact…

But not every relationship stays like that.

I looked down at the paper in my hands now, realizing that I hadn't given him any reaction. Focusing my eyes on the sheet, I read it once. Twice. Three times. My back was to him, thankfully, so he couldn't see the tears that had welled up in my eyes. He couldn't see the tears that fell over and slid down my cheeks, where I hastily wiped them away before he could notice. He couldn't see anything.

I swallowed the lump that had formed in my throat, clutching the paper tightly in my hands – so tight that my fingers left creases on the edges. I felt lightheaded and dizzy, and it suddenly seemed so difficult to breathe. His eyes were on my back, waiting, pending my reaction. I knew it was his dream. This was what he'd always wanted – he said so that one night. I couldn't take that away from him. The opportunity was right in front of him, ready for him to reach out and grab it.

A moment ago, he was happy. Blissful and delighted that he'd gotten accepted. I couldn't destroy his buoyant demeanor. I just couldn't. I was his girlfriend, and I just wouldn't do it.

I wiped away any stray tears and turned around to face him, plastering a strained smile on my face.

The handsome crooked grin he wore faded, so I tried to make my voice sound happy.

"You're going to Juilliard, Edward," I said, laughing supportively like I knew he wanted me to. My smile was weak, at least to me. I was sure he could see how forced it was, but I continued on anyway. "You're going to the most prestigious music school in the nation."

My voice choked, and I hoped that he thought the reason I was crying was out of happiness and not something depressing – though that was the truth.

He smiled again, although this one was much more reserved.

"Yeah, I am," he said, his emerald green eyes bright and radiant as he brushed his thumb against my cheek, wiping away traitor tears. His thumb was rough and calloused – years of guitar playing – but it still felt nice against my skin. My eyes fluttered shut. "I'm going to be a musician," he murmured, smiling dreamily.

I took a step closer and threw my arms around his neck, trying not to sob into his shoulder. But my tears were coming furiously, trailing down my cheek and around my jaw. How much time did we have left together? I curled my fingers around his shirt tightly, pulling him as close to me as possible and burying my face in his neck. His shirt was stained with salty tears, but he didn't seem to mind.

This moment reminded me of my last day at Central Parkway Boarding School, a rich, popular-kid boarding school in Beverly Hills, California. Rosalie and I had gone there for our later high school years, and that was where I'd met Edward.

Looking back on it now, just a year later, it seemed so strange. I thought about how we'd changed, and how we'd loved each other even more. I thought about Alice, Edward's younger sister, and wondered whether I would lose her too. I remembered this sense of loss clear and well, a reminder of my last day at the boarding school. It was back again, this time even more destructive than the last.

"Congratulations," I quietly murmured into his ear, his fingers weaving through my thick, dark locks of hair. I buried my face deeper in his neck, inhaling the familiar sweet scent of him. "I…You…" I stopped, because the lump was back in my throat. "Your dream is coming true."

He laughed softly, his chest shaking. Though it was muted, the sound was so happy, so _ecstatic_ that I just couldn't bring him down, despite how I felt. "Thank you, Bella," Edward whispered, pulling back to wipe away my tears. He had the widest grin on his face. It was lopsided, with a corner of his lips turned upward. My favorite. "Thank you."

He leaned down to kiss me, and I kissed him back as fervently as possible. All of my emotions were in that one kiss. Love, anger, frustration, misery…

I could already feel half of myself disappearing. How much time did we have left until college? We'd lasted throughout senior year, but this wasn't just one year. This was four. And a lot can happen in four years.


	2. Back to Square 1

**Title: **Someday, You'll Know How I Feel**  
**

**Rating: **T for language. and other stuff. xD

**Genre: **Romance. Drama. Humor. Some angst. **  
**

**Type: **All human. Alternate Universe. Out of character.

**Full Summary: **Sequel to_ You Asked Me to Love You_. Edward's on the road to fame. Bella's on the road to fortune. Can these two deal with love and loss while trying to survive the real world? More importantly, can their relationship stay intact, or will everything fall to pieces?

**AN NOTE:** heyyy! its me again! lol. im SOO happy with the feedback for this story. im so glad you guys are hyped for it. and dont worry, you'll get to read it. obviously. HOWEVER. i will be focusing on my other story, _Tuned and Confidential,_more (it was once called a single perception. but i changed the name. xD) And i will, mostly because im further along than this one. But dont worrry, you'll get occasinoal updates. Just know that my weekly updates will be for ASP. xD

**Disclaimer:** i dont own twilight. :D

now, read chapter 1! itll be the only chapter tyou're gonna get for a while. xD review please. :) also, it would be helpful to listen to Come Home by OneRepublic for like the beginning of the chap. it seems to work for me. xD

* * *

**CHAPTER 1 – Back to Square 1**

_Emmett –_

_Today is September 13, as I'm sure you know. I'm turning 24 today. It's amazing how quickly time has passed by. I thought life would be slow, you know, with Edward all over the world and whatnot. Hey, I know it's sort of random for me to be emailing you suddenly, and I know you're busy. But you're the second closest thing to Rose I can get, besides Alice, so I'm confiding in you. I know. There must be something wrong with me._

_At the end of your senior year at CP, you told me to email you about my good old boyfriend. So here I go for the umpteenth time in seven years… _

_You've probably seen him on TV a lot, because, well, Edward is on the verge of becoming a star. I support him, love him, talk to him over the phone. But that's just it – everything is over the phone. And I miss him, Em, I do. But he sounds so happy, you know? That tone of success is all over his voice. And I can't let him down. It's what I've been telling myself all these years - don't let him down. But it's all what he wants, not what I want. I'm worried, Em. I really am.  
_

_Remember when I turned eighteen? God. That was six years ago. I just…I can't believe it, you know? It was like…six years ago, Edward and I were perfect. And now it's like we don't even exist. I miss him, Emmett. But you already know that… but anyway…I'm sorry for ranting about my love life to ya ;) I guess all I can say is…I'm lonely again. I'm back to who I was before Central Parkway. _

_Anyway, Alice is throwing me a party tonight, and it's fine that you can't come. I really do hope you and Jasper are well with your company. Have you even decided a name yet? Well, good luck! And mail me back.  
_

_Bells_

My fingers stopped drumming across the keyboard, and I took them off and folded them neatly in my lap. Then I stared at the clock on the screen. 7:34 AM. My eyes darted to the email, and I wondered when it would be read. Emmett was probably really busy trying to start up the company with Jasper. Rosalie was still in law school in Connecticut and Alice was at her own fashion studio trying to get up the latest fashion line and whatnot. Edward was all the way in California performing at some concert thingy. And then I, Isabella Marie Swan, was stuck in the hectic world of NYC.

I sighed one last time, telling myself to just accept life. Then I clicked "Send".

-------o-------

Scowling, I leaned against the side of the bar counter, glaring at the ticking clock on the opposite wall. It's arms moved slowly, every passing second seeming endless and everlasting. Why wasn't anyone leaving? It was 12 AM already! I huffed and crossed my arms, giving the bartender a dirty look when he offered me a drink.

Over my dead body.

People were dancing all around me, shaking their hips and throwing their arms into the air carelessly, as if this was the happiest night on Earth. Hell, it wasn't even their night. They were just having fun. Idiots.

I scowled again, blowing my bangs up as I felt all claustrophobic. Our NYC apartment was absolutely large, thanks to the heaps of money Alice had made. My small portion of journalism money barely paid for the water expenses. The apartment was also filled with what seemed like hundreds of people, so the air around me was stuffy and warm. Alice Cullen was always into big affairs, and she never went halfway in anything.

Glancing around at the moving people, I spotted a guy next to me, not really giving a care as I grabbed his drink and poured it down my throat. The liquid alcohol burned and scorched, but I ignored it and slammed the glass against the marble countertop. Nobody heard the clink it made.

Sticking my tongue out at the man, I merely pushed off the counter and grumpily made my way toward the staircase, which – unfortunately – was on the other side of the apartment. I wearily pushed through the moving bodies, trying to keep my balance in the four-inch high, black stiletto heels Alice had given me. I was never really coordinated.

Some girl, whose name I didn't know, walked up to me, a wide, tipsy grin on her lips as she stumbled. Her short, light blond hair bounced along with her movements as she danced and whooped.

"Happy birthday, Belinda!" she shouted loudly, taking a huge drink out of the beer bottle in her hand.

I offered her a tight smile. "Thanks," I said. "But…it's Bella."

"What?!" she shouted, bending over to hear me and nearly falling over. I grabbed onto her small shoulders, steadying her. "I can't hear you, Bailey!"

"My name's Bella!"

The girl frowned, downing the rest of her drink. Then her confused blue eyes met mine. "Oh. Well, bye, Beatrice!"

The girl drunkenly stumbled away, shaking her body to the beat of some Cascada song before disappearing behind a horde of people.

I sighed, about to take another step when Alice appeared before me, looking cute yet sexy in a red tube top and dark skinny jeans. The outfit hugged her curves in all the right places, and her long, jet black hair was tied into a high ponytail. Her small, glossy lips pulled up into an excited smile.

"BELLS!" Alice sang in her silky though slightly slurred voice. She began twirling around in place, bobbing her head to the beat. "Why…aren't you d-dancing?" She hiccupped, but grinned cheerily.

I grimaced, putting my weight onto my left foot while fidgeting with my fingers. I felt slightly guilty, for Alice had my whole birthday planned out carefully, with the caterers, the bartenders, and the invitations. Anything so that I could enjoy my birthday. But there was only one thing I wanted, and she and I both knew I wouldn't get it.

Pushing the sad thought out of my mind, I merely said, "Because…" I took one look at her drunk, unsteady figure and pointed behind her, screaming, "HEY! IS THAT CHACE CRAWFORD?"

Alice's head twisted faster than a rattlesnake, and I took the moment to make a mad dash to the stairs, wincing when I passed by the thronged gift table. There were boxes and presents everywhere, much to my dismay.

I glanced behind me to find Alice looking around, her gorgeous, blue-green eyes searching for someone – particularly me. I bit my lip and headed for the bathroom door, easily pulling it open.

"Ew! Get out!" I shrieked at the couple making out in the shower. They glowered at me before dashing away. "Don't you dare touch my bedroom!" I yelled after them before slamming the door shut and locking it.

The music was considerably quieter, but still.

I flipped the switch, watching a yellowish light flicker on right above the wide mirror. Glancing at my reflection, I allowed myself a small smile, despite how miserable I felt. Alice had done a great job on me tonight, but of course, it was Alice. And only Alice could pull off something like this.

I was dressed in a simple yet fashionable outfit. A white tank top underneath my black vest, and dark black jeans that matched. It was comfortable and chic, and that was why I liked it. My dark, chocolate brown hair was in curls, the same shade as my brown eyes. I was overall a simple-looking, sort of pretty kind of girl, but compared to Alice or my sister Rosalie, I was nothing.

I bit the inside of my cheek and sat down on the covered toilet seat, glumly resting my elbows on my knees. I dropped my head into my hands, a quiet sob escaping my lips.

I sat there, somewhat enjoying this alone time more than I should have. I knew Alice wanted me out there, partying and celebrating with everyone else. After all, it was _my_ birthday, _my_ party. But I didn't want a party. I didn't want people over at our house partying and wasting themselves. What I wanted, I couldn't have.

I suddenly remembered one night at Central Parkway Boarding School, the school I'd attended to finish my junior and senior years of high school. My sister, Rosalie, and I had come around the middle of the semester, Rosalie in her senior year and me in my junior year.

It was Christmas Eve, and the school was hosting the Winterfest Dance. Rather than being at the dance, I had spent nearly the entire night at my current boyfriend Edward's dorm. We had the most magical night. He sang to me and played his guitar, and he ended up spending the night at my room. It was completely innocent, of course, but that night was life-changing. It will forever be stored in my memory.

Before I knew it, I was bawling into my hands. I missed Edward so much. We'd been dating ever since my junior year there. Why did he have to go to Juilliard, which just _had_ to be on the other side of the country? Why did he have to be discovered? Why was he taken away from me?

I gave a frustrated half-growl, half-sob, as I slid onto the floor and leaned my head against the wall behind me. My thoughts were haywire as I replayed the things that could have been done differently. The things that could have changed my current state. Maybe, if only I'd gotten accept to Columbia, or NYU, or _something_, he wouldn't have been snatched so easily. If only I hadn't encouraged him, we might still be close together…if only there was _time…_

I had dreams of us having little babies. I had dreams of us growing old together, of me dying with his strong arms wrapped around me. I had dreams of us in heaven, our young, seventeen-year-old selves again. But these were dreams. My dreams almost never came true. And when they did, they were taken away from me. Just like Edward.

I thought back to a conversation Edward and I had had during the summer before college. We were sitting on the front porch of my small home in Forks, enjoying the warmth of a rare sunny day.

_"Last night, I had a dream,"_ Edward had told me. I remember the look in his stunning green eyes, the affectionate, loving look that was only for me.

I stared at him questioningly, waiting for him to continue while I played with his long, slender fingers. He stared out at the blue sky, a small smile tugging at his lips.

_"It was about you."_ I remember blushing, because any time he said sweet things to me, I always felt my face flush crimson. I sniffled now, roughly wiping away my tears. _"You were wearing a beautiful wedding dress, and you were walking down the aisle to me. I remember thinking, 'My Bella. My silly, beautiful, insensitive Bella.'"_ He laughed then, wrapping his arm around me and nuzzling his face in my hair. His breath tickled the back of my neck. Then he softly whispered in my ear, _"You carried a bouquet of freesias. It seemed as if you were walking so, so slowly. I couldn't wait. I almost ran away from the altar, you know."_

We both laughed then, and I laughed now in reality, feeling my heart clench at the memory of him. Where was he? What was he doing? Was he thinking about me, like I was thinking of him?

I wanted him here to celebrate with me. He missed my birthday last year, and the year before that. I wanted him _here_. I wanted him to come home. I didn't need a cake or presents or anything. I needed _him. _Right now.

_"Your hair was in curls, and you had an adorable smile on your face,"_ he murmured, kissing my cheek. _"You were the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen in my entire life."_

I sniffled, telling myself to just suck it up. I stood up, turning to face my reflection. Just the sight of me made me want to bawl all over again. Although I looked decent before, it was because the make-up did wonders. Now, my make-up was smeared and nearly nonexistent – my mask was removed. My eyes were puffy and red, my skin dry and sticky with the salty tears.

I touched my curly hair, allowing one last teardrop slip down my cheek. I'd had dreams of our wedding day, too. But lately…

I sighed as I turned on the faucet, knowing full well that Alice would kill me for wiping it all off. But it was pointless now.

I splashed the cool water onto my face, daring myself to look again at my reflection. Without the make-up, I was broken – anyone could see that. I wore a mask only Alice could see through, but even then, she didn't understand. Nobody understood me.

My tears mixed in with the sink water, and I eventually gave up, wiping my face on a soft, fluffy towel. If anything, I looked worse, because my eye make-up had smeared to become a grayish shadow around my eyes. I briefly considered spending the rest of the night in the bathroom, but my phone buzzed in my back pocket. One glance at the message-sender made me considerably happier.

_How's the party, love? I miss you. And happy birthday again._

_-Edward_

I gave a strained laugh, shaking my head at Edward's text. God, how I missed him.

_You've said that so much lately. And it's fine, actually._

I hit the send button, drumming my fingers against the sink counter as I waited impatiently for his response. Any form of communication with him had me all jittery and excited.

It seemed like eons before he finally replied.

_Really? It certainly doesn't sound just 'fine'._

I frowned and texted, "What do you mean?"

Edward's reply only confused me even more.

_Sounds kind of loud to me._

My jaw dropped, my eyes widening as I racked my brain trying to figure out whether I missed anything. Edward didn't say he was coming back today, right? I thought he'd said he'd be back on the twentieth…a week from now…

While I still pondered over his text, I received yet another one.

_Go to your bedroom._

I barely glanced at it before wrenching the bathroom door open, clumsily stuffing the phone back into my pocket before making a mad dash to the stairs.

Along the way, I passed by the couple from earlier. I tapped on the guy's shoulder, and he turned to me with questioning brown eyes.

"Bathrooms open!" I called giddily, running away.

I clambered up the stairs, my heart racing in my chest as I thought of Edward. His eyes, his hair, his lips…

Upstairs, it was much quieter, to my surprise, and I ran down the hallway, stumbling twice.

When I got to my bedroom door, I came to an unsteady halt, wondering if maybe the text was from a stalker or something. It could be. But the happy, jubilant side of me refused to accept that. Was he really here?

I shakily turned the doorknob and cautiously poked my head into the empty room, feeling a huge smile grace my face when I saw the Adonis sitting on my bed, looking tired but as gorgeous as I remembered him.

"Edward!" I screamed excitedly, all insecurities thrown out the window as I ran towards him. About halfway there, I stumbled clumsily, barely making it to the ground before his strong, pale arms slipped around my waist.

A soft, seductive chuckle filled my ear, and I breathed a sigh of relief, vaguely wondering if this was a dream.

I jumped onto him, knocking us both over and onto the bed. He wrapped his arms around me tightly, and I pulled myself as close as possible, making sure that all the airspace between us was filled.

Squealing, I gently cupped his face in my hands and pressed my lips against his, trying to remember the last time we'd kissed. It seemed like ages ago.

He responded enthusiastically, and we proceeded to have a hot make-out session. No, I'm kidding.

Edward did pull back first though, taking heavy, ragged breaths as he smiled crookedly at me. His emerald green eyes glistened and sparkled, his pale skin flawless though slightly rough around his jaw. Giggling like a little schoolgirl, I kissed the stubble around his jaw.

"Edward, what are you doing here?" I managed to ask, still grinning like an idiot. I didn't really care, but was still curious to know.

He frowned. "Did you not --"

I quickly interrupted him with a kiss. "Of course not," I reassured him, gazing into his emerald green eyes. "I'm just shocked, that's all."

He smiled warmly at me, gently brushing his lips against my forehead. "I refuse to miss your birthday this year_._"

I cocked my head to the side, opening my mouth to speak, but Edward put a finger to my lips. "Shh, we'll discuss it later. Right now, I just want you and me and nobody else."

I blushed, leaning down to press my lips against his. "I love you," I mumbled to him between kisses. "I love you, I love you, _I love you._"

"I love you, too, Bella," Edward sighed against my hair, sounding dreamy and totally in love. I loved that. "Miss me much?" he teased.

I threw my head back and laughed the most buoyant laugh in what felt like years. His warm lips glided along my neck, placing gentle kisses in every single spot. It was heaven. This was where I wanted to be for my entire life – Edward's arms.

"I see you two have found each other," Alice slurred from my bedroom doorway. She was clutching a beer bottle in one hand, waving at us in acknowledgement. "Edward, how are ya brotha?"

Edward laughed, but he didn't move from our comfortable position on the bed.

"Alice," he nodded, smiling at her. "I'm doing well. You must be really high right now."

My best friend scoffed. "I ain't high. I'm low, you dummy."

She rolled her eyes and stumbled out of the room, thankfully shutting the door behind her. Finally, we were separated from the real world. Somewhat.

There was a moment of silence, and then I said, "Did she just insult herself?"

Edward chuckled, the sound music to my ears. "I believe so."

I giggled, suddenly feeling all lovey-dovey, and kissed him hard again, enjoying the assuring feeling that he was here with me, and not on the other side of the nation.

"Welcome home," I murmured against his lips.

"Silly Bella," Edward said, resting his forehead against mine and gazing into my eyes. "Home is wherever you are."

--  
**aww, how cute. xD okay imma let yall know that i have never been to New York...so...i mean, i have seen apartments with more than one level. so lets just assume that this is one of them okay? but if it doesnt work and its annoying you, let me know and ill chang eit into a house or something.**

**anyway, i sure hope this chapter is good. i know tehre are some changes, like alice having long hair (did you notice?), but dont worry - those were deliberate. hope this was a good first chapter :)**

**NOW. GO REVIEW FOR THIS, AND THEN GO READ TUNED AND CONFIDENTIAL. because you love me. :D lol. :)**


	3. Exchange the Rumors, Feel the Love

**okay. i sat down, and i was like, "I NEED TO UPDATE THIS STORY." so here ya go,. xD this is sort of a fluffy, kind of a build up chapter. yes, i know its early, but i have a lot of plans for this story. like. a LOT. :) i dont think emmett and rosalie are going to have big roles in this, but we'll see. theres also gonna be a surprise character, if you wanna guess who it is? leave a review letting meknoww. i wont give you a cliffie or anything. those kill me xD**

**sorry i didnt update sooner. ive been working on _Tuned and Confidential,_ and i just came back from vacation yesterdat night. right now im planning a third ff, which has yet to be written. so yeah. fluff, humor, and badassness in htis hcapter. LOL. **

**by the way, happy independence day. :)  
**

**leave a review guys!**

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**CHAPTER 2 – Exchange the Rumors, Feel the Love**

"Done, Mr. King," I said, stiffly dropping three files onto Garrett's desk.

Garrett King looked up from the computer screen, eyed the three manila folders, and then glanced at me. I didn't miss the fact that his eyes trailed provocatively down my front, lingering a moment too long on my legs, and then up to my chest, before finally resting back on my face.

Clearing my throat and uncomfortably crossing my arms, I said, "The article goes out at three, am I correct?" I didn't wait for an answer. "You might want to get started on your articles."

I spun on my heel (literally) and flew towards the door, feeling his pale green eyes focused on a very specific area beneath my skirt. I pursed my lips and reached for the golden knob, eager to escape his office as soon as possible. I couldn't wait to get promoted.

I'd started working at _Twilight Press_ about two years earlier, fresh out of college. In fact, I had attended Berkeley as an English major, keen on becoming a journalist, while Edward was all the way on the other side of the country attending Juilliard in New York. We called each other periodically, and met up whenever we could. Everything was perfect, until he got discovered…

Anyway, _Twilight Press _was and is the top news reporting company in the US. I liked it the moment I began, because my boss was a wise and friendly man. However, he retired a year later and was replaced with some other guy whose tactics were awfully different. He wasn't mean, but I wasn't too fond of him. But it didn't matter what I felt; this was a job that I needed, and Alice wouldn't be forced to pay all the bills.

"Miss Swan," Garrett said, and I grudgingly turned around and quirked an eyebrow at him.

"Yes?"

He smirked, and I was instantly reminded of my high school years with Edward. He used to smirk a lot as well, and back then, I found it incredibly annoying. Presently, they fell on a more seductive turn, which I didn't mind. But Garrett's were far from that, and the only thing they did was make my spine crawl.

"You have very sexy legs," he informed me, staring at them appreciatively.

If Edward were the one to say it, I would have blushed. But it wasn't, so I glared at Garrett, trying to subtly shift my position.

Biting back a snappy comment, I opened my mouth to speak. "Mr. King, I currently have a boyfriend. And if you knew any better—"

"Yeah, yeah," Garrett interjected, leaning back in his desk chair and smiling at me. "Isn't he that Edwin guy? The newest artist to top the charts?"

"His name is Edward," I said, scowling. "And yes."

Garrett contemplated this for a moment, a frown lingering on his face. If I hadn't known Edward, I would have thought Garrett was a particularly handsome man. He was around 27 years old, tall, built, and a keen ladies' man. I was told that he had busy nights with different girls, and the thought of it only made me hate him even more. He had a head of curly brown hair and curious green eyes that had probably seen a lot of inappropriate things. All in all, Edward was better than him. **(Smirk :P)**

Garrett laughed then, a lock of brown hair falling into his eyes. "I hear he's going out with Amelia Vane."

I winced, feeling as though someone had just driven a knife into my chest. "Where did you hear that?" I asked, unable to conceal my misery.

"Front cover_,_" he said indifferently, tossing me an _Exchange_ magazine.

Across the front was an alluring picture of Edward, whose messy bronze-colored hair was in my favorite disarray. His eyes were light and amused, as he spoke into a phone pressed against his ear. Meanwhile, on the other half of the page, was a picture of a gorgeous, blond-haired woman on the Red Carpet, her hair piled high on top of her head and a dazzling smile on her face. I wrinkled my nose.

Amelia Vane. I'd heard of her – 22 years old, famous actress, fashion icon. Gritting my teeth, I threw the magazine back onto the table and glared at Garrett.

"Lies," I said confidently.

Garrett laughed. "Wouldn't be so sure."

"Edward wouldn't cheat on me," I retorted. "These magazines spend their time ruining lives of celebrities. He has a girlfriend, and it's _not_ Amelia."

"Is someone jealous?" Garrett sang, twirling a pen in his fingers and wiggling his eyebrows at me.

I rolled my eyes. "I'm not jealous, Mr. King. I'm only speaking the truth." I pressed my finger against the headline, which read _'EDWARD CULLEN AND AMELIA VANE?'_ and glared at him. "This is bull. They filmed one music video together, and that was it," I said icily.

Garrett smirked approvingly, unconsciously licking his lips. "You know, Miss Swan, you're incredibly sexy when you're mad."

"You're a jerk," I said, withdrawing my hand and heading for the door.

Garrett's deep, enthusiastic laughter echoed as I left his office.

-------o-------

"Yes, I need the clothes shipped _by tomorrow_!" Alice shrieked into the phone, scurrying around the store_._ "No delays, Gabriel. Yes. No. Of course not. Yes, I did drink my coffee this morning thank you very much."

She slammed her phone shut and brushed right past me, seemingly not noticing my presence. Her silky black hair was pulled up into a messy bun, a few loose strands dangling here and there. I watched, amused, as her tiny hands hastily rearranged the little mannequins and adjusted the clothing on them. It was five minutes later when she actually saw me.

"Oh, hey, Bells!" she said perkily, her attitude a stark contrast to how it was on the phone. "I'll be closing up soon, so hang on a sec."

Alice smiled at me before disappearing behind the back door.

I sat down on one of the plushy red couches of her store, admiring the friendly and welcoming decorations.

Alice had gone to an art institute in Chicago for three full years before dropping out to begin her own clothing line, _ST-Mate. _I always knew Alice had a thing for designing, because at Central Parkway Boarding School, she'd designed both my and Rosalie's dress for one of the school dances. In all of the years I'd known her, Alice was always the creative one.

I glanced around, sighing contently, until I noticed the _Exchange _magazine sitting on the opposite couch. It was the same one from Garrett's office earlier today.

Grimacing, I reached over and picked it up, examining the title as if I was searching for every miniscule pixel that made it up. Edward looked flawlessly handsome, for he was wearing _my_ crooked grin while he spoke. He didn't seem to notice the paparazzi in this particular photo.

And then I looked at the stunning actress, who was undoubtedly on _PEOPLE _magazine's _100 Most Beautiful People _list, and my pride and dignity crumbled.

"Oh, yeah, I was looking at that earlier this morning," Alice said, suddenly appearing beside me. She pulled the band out of her hair, sighing as the inky black hair spread across her back. Her calm, hazel eyes found my chocolate brown ones. "You know it's not true, right?" Alice asked in a musical voice.

I nodded, grimly glancing back at the cover. Why was Amelia so damn pretty? I glanced at the table of contents before flipping to the page with the article. The more I read, the more miserable I felt.

_COVER STORY: Could love be on the horizon for the 'Her Eyes' singer and 'Apple Creek' starlet?_

_"They've been constantly communicating with constant texts and emails," says an insider. "It seems Edward's 'Take Her Hand' music video has been a fantastic connection between these two. They really can't get enough of each other."_

_But is this true? Is Edward really in love with yet _another_ woman?_

_"It wouldn't be a surprise," says Amelia's agent. "He's a man, and he has desires. Amelia is a beautiful woman and there is no doubt she is perfect for him. They had instant chemistry the moment they met. You can tell, because there's that spark."_

_But the 'Her Eyes' singer is known to be dating small town but rich girl, Isabella 'Bella' Swan. The two have been dating – a source says – for _six,_ going on _seven_, years. Could this be the end for such a long-lasting relationship? Is Edella soon to become Ameliward? Could—_

"Hey! I was reading that!" I exclaimed, fuming as Alice tossed the closed magazine onto the glass table.

She brought her gaze back to mine, and I was surprised to find that it was fierce and angry.

"Bella Swan," she said, firmly grasping my shoulders and looking into my eyes. "He's in love with only one girl, and that's you," Alice said, her voice confident and sure. "He loved you in high school, he loved you in college, he loves you now, and he will never stop loving you. Besides, 'Ameliward' is the dumbest name I've ever heard. It sounds like a disease."

I laughed quietly, watching as Alice grinned cutely at me, and fingered the bracelet that Edward had given me in high school. Yes, I kept it. And yes, I do wear it. Everyday.

"_Exchange_ tells lies. And yet everybody reads it," Alice added sadly, eyeing the magazine on the table with narrowed eyes. "Besides, this isn't the first time they've paired him up with someone. Last month, he was rumored to be dating, whatshername…Kristen? Kristen Cadalasky. Remember when the media and news reporters that stood on our doorstep?" Alice shuddered, and then grinned at me. "He loves _you_, Bells. I promise."

I stared into her genuinely warm eyes for a long moment, and then sighed and nodded curtly. Fidgeting with the sleeve of my coat, I muttered, "It's weird, having some of your personal life out for the world to see."

Alice nodded and smiled grimly. "Imagine how terrible it must be for Edward. But, Bells, he needs you," she declared sternly, and I laughed quietly. You could always count on Alice to cheer you up.

Her cherry pink lips widened into a small smile as she checked her watch. "It's getting late now; we should head home. If I'm not mistaken, a horny man is at home waiting for his beautiful girlfriend."

I laughed, feeling the blood creep up my neck and across my entire face as I stood up.

"Ah, yes, stilettos," Alice said, eyeing my black shoes appreciatively. "I'm proud of you, Bella." Then she noticed me blushing, and her tinkling laughter filled the atmosphere. "What are you blushing about? Everyone knows you guys did the naughty sophomore year," she said casually, as if we were discussing the weather forecast for tomorrow.

My jaw dropped, and I turned away so she couldn't see my now incredibly dark red face. "You know what? I think I'll go home."

Alice giggled, giving me a light shove towards the exit. "Bella, sweetie, I'll be going with you."

When we arrived at the apartment, me massaging my ankles and Alice panting for breath (walking was more efficient than driving in NYC), I'd barely opened my purse before the door flew open, and Edward appeared looking as gorgeous as he did this morning.

"Bella," he breathed, totally disregarding the dying Alice beside us.

I couldn't fight off the grin that formed on my face. "Edward."

There wasn't much I could say after that. Edward cupped my cheek and pulled me in for a head-spinning, mind-reeling kiss that left me breathless when he pulled away. His lips were like a second home.

Smiling at me, he whispered, "I missed you."

I giggled like a little schoolgirl, still trying to steady my breathing. Only Edward could make me act like this. "I missed you too," I replied, blushing.

"And I miss my bed! So please, out of the doorway," Alice huffed, sticking her tongue out at us as she brushed past us. "Good night, guys!" she called, clambering loudly up the stairs. "If I hear any suspicious noises, Edward, you're sleeping on the couch!" she hollered before disappearing behind the corner.

Edward and I glanced at each other before laughing, and I dropped my things onto the floor beside the couch, sighing contently.

"Hmm, what's that smell?" I asked suddenly, wrapping my arms around his neck and smiling lazily at him.

Edward cocked his head to the side, an innocent expression on his face. "Is it…bad? Pungent?"

I laughed, shaking my head. "No. It's mouthwatering, actually."

"So are you," Edward replied, smirking.

I rolled my eyes, smacked his shoulder, and made a beeline for the kitchen. I was only able to take two steps before he grabbed my wrist and covered my eyes.

"What are you doing?" I asked, fighting the urge to smile.

"I'm going to dump you in a pot of steaming hot water, shave your head, and run you over with a car – twice," he said sarcastically. "No. C'mon, love."

I laughed as he steered me towards the direction of the balcony, and I knew I was outside when cool night air met my face, followed by the aroma of tomato sauce and just a tiny twinge of smoke.

"Voila!" he said happily, chuckling as he removed his hands from my eyes.

I gasped.

The balcony was lit up by two tall wax candles shining brightly on a circular table, covered in a clean white tablecloth. One huge plate of spaghetti sat in the center, with a fork on either side of it. There was a bottle of wine and two glasses on a tray balanced precariously on the surrounding wall of the balcony. Two chairs were placed right next to each other, and the candlelight flickered and bobbed, making it the most romantic scene ever.

I looked up at Edward in awe, and he had his hands shoved deep into his pockets, a sheepish grin on his face. His dark green eyes, warm yet slightly uncertain, met mine.

Smiling, he gingerly reached for a chair and pulled it out, gesturing for me to sit down.

I – still being a speechless idiot – sat down and glanced around yet again, unable to take in the environment. The night was oddly peaceful and serene, and the stars seemed to shine _extra _brightly, though the city lights were still illuminated. But the whole set up…he didn't…_do_ this for me, right? It seemed like a lot.

I was vaguely aware of the fact that the chair beside me scraped across the pavement, and that Edward gracefully sat down in it, his expression curious and scrutinizing mine. The flames on the candles flickered again, casting a shadow over half of his flawless face.

"Bon appetit," he said, a corner of his lips turned up into a grin.

"Merci," I replied airily, still sounding shocked. "This is…incredible," I said, for lack of a better word. I felt highly unworthy now. "Thank you _so much_, Edward. I—wow." Yep, I was quite the speaker.

Edward chuckled while I blushed.

"You didn't have to do this," I mumbled, already planning some sort of date night extravaganza for him.

Edward laughed and kissed my forehead, a smile on his face. He pulled away and grinned crookedly at me. "Ah, yes, but I did." He reached over, picked up one of the forks, and twirled strings of spaghetti onto it.

Then, he turned to me with a guilty expression. "I'm going to warn you again," he said quickly. "If this proves inedible—"

"—then I'll let you know, and I have the permission to hit you thirty times with a crowbar," I finished, giggling. "Edward, your food is always delicious," I assured him.

He stared at me for a moment, and then a satisfied smile formed on his face. Then, he leaned over and brought the forkful of pasta to my mouth.

"I love you," he said, grinning while I chewed.

Swallowing, I reached for the second fork. I repeated his actions, smiling at the way his mouth moved when he chewed. God, I was definitely a lovesick puppy -- completely and utterly infatuated with this man.

We talked a bit, chatted idly. I spent most of the time admiring the way his lips moved, or the sparkle in his emerald green eyes, or the precise shade of his hair in certain aspects of light. Sometimes it would be the familiar bronze, but then it would shift to an auburn tone. Nonetheless, he was still the handsomest, most gentlemanly man on the planet.

"You know, I kind of want to try something," Edward had said, ten minutes into the dinner.

I put the glass of wine down onto the table and quirked an eyebrow at him. "Let's hear it."

He chuckled, taking one of my hands into his. "You see, in the _Lady and the Tramp_…"

"Let's do it!" I interjected enthusiastically, reaching for a string of pasta.

Edward looked at me incredulously before doubling over in laughter. "Right, love, I'll take one end, and you take the other," he said cheerily, still chuckling to himself.

I brought the one end into my mouth, watching as Edward did the same with his end of the piece of spaghetti. We looked at each other, and Edward crossed his eyes, causing me to laugh and drop my end. I hastily put it back into my mouth, ignoring the smug smile on his face.

"This is the most cleethey thing I'ff efer fone," I said, shaking my head at him, but smiling regardless, overwhelmed with my love for him. "I luff fu."

Edward chuckled. "I luff fu choo, Bella."

--  
**haha cute. :)))** **now audrey has some explaining to do:**

**-ok. for the whole garrett king thing, i acutally had a debate over what his name should be. i considered changing it to turner, because i think in wtda's sequel, his name was...royce king? something? yeah. well. i tried really hard not to copy her, but i also wanted this story to go a certain way in which i was satisfied. and for your information, garrett king is a guy that goes to my school. teehee! :P hes not perverted or anything though. i think. ut i promise -- no plans to copy Welcome to the Real World. :D**

**-secondly, haha. i got the idea of amelia vane from the whole robert/kristen/emelie scandal thingy. ive been reading the mags and wondering whether or not its true. o_o i feel bad for them.  
**

**-and lastly, the fluff in this chapter is probably one of the longest fluffs you'll get in this story. MAYBE. you'll see what i mean later on. :P **

**this is a long A/N. ill try to update ASAP. :) oh, and the st-mate thing, haha get it? ST-MAte? Estimate? hehe. i thought it was cool. idk. im weird.  
**

**NOW REVIEW! itll make me more inspired to write :D**


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